Laura Bush bought Bush a parrot for his birthday.
She told Dick Cheney, “The bird is so smart! George has already taught him to mispronounce over 200 words!”
“Wow, that’s pretty impressive,” Cheney said. “But you realize that he just says the words. He doesn’t understand what they mean.”
“That’s okay,” Laura replied. “Neither does the parrot.”
——————————————-
President Bush was visiting a school. The children were in the middle of a discussion relating to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the discussion on the word ‘tragedy’. So the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a tragedy.
One boy stood up and offered, “If my best friend who lives on a farm is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him that would be a tragedy”. “No”, said Bush, “that would be an accident”.
A girl raised her hand, “If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, that would be a tragedy’. “No”, said Bush, “that would be a great loss”.
The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Bush searched the room, “Isn’t there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?”
Finally, at the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand, “If Airforce One carrying you and Mrs. Bush was struck by a ‘friendly fire’ missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy”.
“Fantastic!” exclaimed Bush, “that’s right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?”
“Well”, says little Johnny. “It has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn’t be a great loss and it probably wouldn’t be an accident either.”
——————————————-
The Agent salutes and says, “Welcome back, Mr. President. Nice pigs, sir.”
Clinton smiles and says, “These aren’t pigs. These are genuine Arkansas Razorbacks. I got this one for Hilary, and I got this one for Chelsea.”
The Agent says, “Good trade, sir.”



